Submissivania Whapp, it turns out, is not only a pretty woman. She’s become an accomplished pony rider over the years in a secret canyon of the urban sprawl of Los Angeles. And she’s become the best-selling author of the world’s most sought after erotica in the late-night glow of her bedroom computer. And she’s a top-gun corporate executive on week days. And she’s the youngest of the White House’s favorite secret agents ~ 24 years old. And she hasn’t moved out of her parent’s sprawling suburban-ranch home yet.
Ms. Whapp lets go these autobiographicals as she massages my neck & shoulders. This massaging endeavor of hers causes me to swiftly recover from my swoons. Now her close proximity is elevating me to a clairvoyant height I’ve never obtained before in a Greyhound bus seat. Her flowery scent, her warm breath, the congenial display of valley and hillock within licking distance lifts my consciousness out of a muck that it’s been languishing in for I don’t know how many years. The clairvoyance I’m experiencing is startling. I actually witness angels grouped around the exterior of the bus protecting it from traffic accidents as it speeds along the highway. My religiousity soars as Ms. Whapp’s hands, saintly lampoons, knead all cares and worries out of my teetering over-the-hill body. I’m an ecstatic old timer ~ downright near experiencing levitation.
We roll past stacks of cotton on cotton farms, into the desert town of Gila Bend, and park for a hamburger and a coke. We’ve got 20 minutes.
While we scarf-up the delicacies at Carl’s Jr. I tell Submissivania, “This is where I sold books out of a truck once upon a time. Right here, right here where we’re sitting.”
“Really, Rawclyde, you’re so funny!” bubbles my favorite secret-agent partner.
“Right here in this very spot, before this hamburger joint was ever here,” I tell her. “I sold a little book of lyrics written by old Hank Williams to a school teacher one day. A half hour later another school teacher come by all excited and buy a fat biography of Pancho Villa.”
“That’s hilarious, Rawclyde!” giggles Submissivania.
I got the feeling that this pretty woman is patronizing the old man. Which, in actuality, is okay with me. She slyly looks around, sticks a french fry into a puddle of catchup on her tray, pops it into her mouth. I take another bite of my burger, gulp down some coke. The burger isn’t too bad.
“I called that old truck ~ Rawclyde’s Book Mule.”
“Oh Rawclyde! How cute!”